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12 January 2009 @ 10:54 pm
The Call (#5: Choice)  
Genre: The Chronicles of Narnia
Title: The Call
Chapter Title: Choice (005/100)
Author: catalyst283
Word count: 355
Rating: G
Warnings: More angst, sorry. D:
Notes: This is another image that I just could not get out of my head, as much as I tried. It needed to be written. I’m not sure if anyone else has thought of this—it is just one of the many takes I have on this…choice, this action. Also, I must note that this is most likely an AU from the other drabbles I’ve written. Whether or not it fits with movie canon is up to you…

Oh and this drabble contains a slightly different Caspian and a slightly different Susan than from the movie--older, most likely, and their relationship is portrayed as being much deeper (I dunno if I want to say more intimate, exactly, but...deeper than just a kiss and some interaction here and there that was in the movie...) here than the movie portrayed it. (The drabble doesn't explicitly imply this, but I feel it is necessary to note with the ending being what it is and all...)

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( fanfiction.net link )

Choice

There must be something I can do…

The words fall from her lips before she can stop them, words that sounded so hollow and desperate even in her head that she cannot believe what she is hearing, much less the fact that she is the one voicing such thoughts aloud. She instantly bites on her lower lip, a bad habit that she knows she didn’t have when the last time they were here.

The great lion gazes at her so sorrowfully that it is almost condescending, as if she is the foolish student that dared to ask about something she can’t possibly ever understand. She knows instinctively that he will just tell her no, there is nothing she can possibly do—and it is this that makes her persist, this feeling that she is finally asking the right question…just at the moment it is too late.

I would do anything…and she knows before she has even finished that it is the completely wrong thing to say.

You do not know what you are offering, he murmurs, for in doing so, you will get what you want—but at a terrible price

Later she will pretend like she simply accepted the fate he bestowed upon her, if only to protect those she loves. It is, after all, a burden that she must bear alone. And she is a good enough actress that they all believe her, right down to the one she is doing this for, right down to the one that would have never let her choose what she did if he had known.

She doesn’t allow herself to glance at him one last time before they leave, knowing she will only cause both of them more pain if she does.

You will find someone else, she silently promises. And she will not break your heart a thousand times before you are even twenty, or treat you just as cruelly as those you once considered family, flat-out lying straight to your face.

Most of all, she will certainly not curse you to be bound to her for eternity, childless.
 
 
Current Location: in Word
Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: Breakin' - The All-American Rejects
 
 
 
Kitorin: susan asunderkitoky on January 13th, 2009 07:01 am (UTC)
This was beautifully, and sadly written, but I'm not quite sure I understand or caught onto what Susan had asked for, and what she was willing to do anything for, and what her sacrifice had to be to attain it or rather, why she sacrificed... her fertility? Her ability to bear children? I'm not quite sure.
Lindsay: ben::rl::thoughtscatalyst283 on July 12th, 2009 05:53 pm (UTC)
The ambiguity is on purpose--but something to that extent. Or rather, she would have sacrificed anything to not have to go home and never come back--but she knew that, as king, Caspian would need an heir to keep the crown in peaceful hands and Aslan suggested that she would never be able to give [Caspian] children if she were to stay....the law of equivalent exchange as chatonelle put it, sort of.

(late comment is very late. :x)
Lucyxxlucyferxx on January 13th, 2009 09:00 am (UTC)
Agreed with kitoky, the end was a little bit ambiguous...still absolutely gorgeous, though. Thank you. :)
Lindsaycatalyst283 on July 12th, 2009 05:48 pm (UTC)
I tend to write ambiguous endings, sorry. ^^;; Glad you liked it, though. :)
.stephanie.lee.nicole.: picture / anna popplewell / eyestephie_nhbg on January 14th, 2009 01:37 am (UTC)
okay, so she finds out that she can never have children and that's why she leaves? that definetly makes sense. because Caspian, I believe, would really want children. very very good drabble. :)
Lindsaycatalyst283 on July 12th, 2009 05:48 pm (UTC)
Thanks. Glad you liked it. :)
Ti'ana Luthientianaluthien on January 15th, 2009 12:58 am (UTC)
Gorgeous. Heart-breaking. Chilling.

*wild applause*
Lindsaycatalyst283 on July 12th, 2009 05:48 pm (UTC)
Thank you. :)
chatonellechatonelle on January 17th, 2009 10:43 am (UTC)
Stupid lion using the law of equivalent exchange. But she should at least have given Caspian the choice.

I almost cried..
Lindsaycatalyst283 on July 12th, 2009 05:48 pm (UTC)
I know. :(
arthoniel: Random- Flowerarthoniel on January 17th, 2009 10:03 pm (UTC)
slkdjfdlf *flails* Susan...
Lindsaycatalyst283 on July 12th, 2009 05:47 pm (UTC)
I know. :(
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